LIONEL CROMHOUTS FARM
It all started on a wet and windy Saturday Morning. Bike, kit, fuel, loaded! Cooler Box???
Also packed and loaded. “Shoo” The trip started in the rain through Buffalo Pass ( stuck behind a dump truck ) 8km’s an hour !!! Nice ?.Well, the day was only going to get better. I was on my way to ride the infamous “STAIRWAY TO HEAVEN” for the first time. The rain was of no concern me; I had already convinced myself that this would help with regards to traction.
Today was the day these Gas Gas guys, KTM Orange Army and the Lone Rider (19footsack IT 200) were going to see what my Husqvarna TE 450 could do on wet climbs.
After all how bad could it be?
STAIRWAY TO HEAVEN, Sounds like a beautiful scenic route with promise of a spectacular view at the top or something?????. I couldn’t wait to see what I thought must be the 8th wonder of the world…. How wrong can one person be????
12h30, I finally arrived at the farm , my dash board was lit up like a Christmas tree accompanied by buzzing and beeping sounds coming from deep behind the consol. The buzzing was my after market diesel/water separator ,this obviously got wet when I went ploughing through one of the deeper puddles , the beeping sound was the traction control , The Sprinter was not to happy with the terrain/road conditions??? Go Figure!
I thought to myself, this is Africa! The roads are tough in Africa! Get over it!
Bloody Germans! And there Mercs
My old Land Rover would never perform like this!!! And they where made by the Pommies!
(As you know ,these guys can winge!)
Anyway! Let’s get back to the topic shall we.
The rain had now stopped, and the wind had also calmed down. Lekker! “Or was it the quite before the storm?”
Kitted up and ready, we started our Bikes
I pressed the little red button (Happy button) and she fired up instantly. Thud Thud Thud!
What an awesome sound I thought, Shoo, I love this bike, I felt my face sqwinch with a smile as I looked over at my friend with his Gas Gas.
Kick, Kick, Kick and with a short girgle it started! Rangatang tang tang ……tang!
COOL! The ride was on!
We headed for the quarry for a warm up and to play a bit, The red clay/sabunga was not to slippery at all, this was going to be awesome .I immediately felt comfortable and new I had found my rhythm as we headed off to do the loop. At first the narrow paths where very slippery and even when gently rolling on the power in 4th you could feel the traction break, oh well, par for the course I thought. We had to weave and duck our way through a lot of the sections as many tree’s had blown over; this was fast becoming a very tiring ride. I glanced down at that screen thingy, only 2km’s??? Oh no!
Then the hills started! We stopped just before “the point of no return” and was instructed as to what line to take! Ja Ja I thought! I would follow instructions this time BUT! The second loop I’ll show them!!!!!!
What an Awesome climb, the first section must be close to 60 or 70 degrees,
The second climb, steep down hill through rut/hole and up a hectic/sic climb, I again followed instructions as to what lines to take. (No problems)
Then came the highlight!! THE STAIRWAY TO HEAVEN.
The path leading up to it was pretty easy (compared to the climbs we had just done)
Suddenly the path started turning and weaved its way up, by this time I only had 2 fingers on each grip and could feel by body slipping down the seat, No worries I thought, I would just reposition myself on the next turn. Ready, steady, Heave! I pulled my 120kg frame forward and positioned myself for the rest of the climb. Ooohps! ROCKS! I thought who would have put those bloody things here? Did I take a wrong turn or something? NO! There was the Gas Gas! , neatly pinned in between the rocks. I would have loved to use the excuse “My rhythm was broken and did not have enough momentum to clear this section” BUT the truth was, I was already a broken man! Looked down again only 4.5km’s???? Something’s gotta be wrong with this piece of %*$# clock! Perhaps the decimal point had moved and it should read 45km’s that sounded more like it. The Gas Gas had now been reposition so I could get past,
Grabbed a hand full of gas feathered the clutch to propel my self forward, NOTHING! All of a sudden I had 6 neutrals???? .Looking down I saw the hole that had been excavated by my new 602! Awesome!! Ok Time for plan B! Jumping up and hammering my backside on the seat as I let rip! This got me forward and actually placed my front wheel very close to the top! Help was there and we managed to hoist and reposition the rear tyre on top of another rock, one more burst of demonic power from this 450 and I would be out!!! Made it! Saaaaweeeeett!
I removed myself from the ironing board excuse of a seat on the brute that had punished me so much, I hobbled down to go and help the Gas Gas out .. Done!
The view??? Every thing was blurry! My eyes burned from the sweat and tears, my head was over heating and I feared it would explode if I took my helmet off, Arms ached and my fingers numb.We mounted up again and headed down hill. Back brakes locked, playing the front brakes on the verge of doing a front sommie, all I wanted was air through my helmet.
I can’t remember much after that (one big blur) but we made it back to the farm house ok. “Rest!” Aaaagh,,,,
SECOND LOOP
Followed the same lines as recommended all went well.
We did however miss the Stairway to heaven. (Thank goodness)
THIRD LOOP
This time I had an audience, A lot more riders to impress with my Husky (chainsaw)
We started again in the quarry, spraying mud at each other and climbing up the near vertical sides.(great fun) We then all headed out on the loop, I found myself second in the pack as we started to weave through the wattle tree’s , perfect throttle control I thought as the bike kicked out left, right , left and right again. Feeling very confident with myself and the course I decided to explore some new lines!! (You can guess what happened next)
The first rock section, I decided the inside line was better, Placing my foot as high as the front mudguard, perfectly lined for this huge rock. As my foot touched the rock I gave a quick squirt of power and lifted/pulled the bike to the left (perfectly executed I thought) Then the rock gave way!!!! BANG! Crunch, thud!. To make matters worse, here came the rock .CRUNCH! On my foot! I swear I could hear my big toe swelling! Trying to find more space in my Boot.
Picked the bike up and forced a smile out, Oh well I thought #$%* happens.
We got to the first hill climb; I again decided to take a different line where I could hold it in 2nd gear all the way, Wrong again! I was forced to gear down into 1st but seemed to find one of those neutrals from earlier in the day! No big deal! Made it down ok and stuck to the original
Line on the second attempt! “Easy”
The second hill climb was next, this was a steep one!
You have to wheelie over a hole at the bottom of the valley and head up an almost vertical climb. This was going to be awesome, perfect traction from all the bikes climbing up (damp thick heavy brown soil, perfect for cabbages) I again took a different line which allowed me to use 2nd gear, just clipping a rock on the side of the hole my bike shot up sideways!!!! I came to a stand still about five meters up, still seated on the bike “AWESOME”
The rest all happened in slow motion. I felt the bike slowly leaning over to the wrong side! Oh No! That feeling of weightlessness came over me! I suddenly felt nauseous! No footing! My two meters height plus at least a 2m drop, this is going to be a good one! THUD! Bright Light!
And silence. (Not even the Christmas beetles made a sound)
Instantly, I was surrounded by my audience! All miming???? I saw mouths move but no sound!
Finally! , I thought, THIS IS THE STAIRWAY TO HEAVEN! Everything else must have been hell! (It sure felt like it). A minute or two later I was up again and attempted the climb again.
No worries, easy! (I stuck to the recommended line)
The rest of the ride was a blur again! Only coming to my full senses when I collided with several small Wattle trees. The rock sections that I had previously completed flawlessly became impossible to complete , I had by now dropped my beloved bike so many times I had marked the entire course with aluminium from my swing arm.(No red tape needed)
That’s when the thunder/lightning started!!!! The hills and valleys lit up with bright silver/blue light! (Oh no! Not again I thought) I had enough of bright lights for the day. Then the rain came down again “huge drops!”
We decided to head back to the farm house, “Shooo”
At full pace we headed back to get out of what was sure to be a storm of note!
Even the pain of the rain drops of what felt like somebody shooting me with a BB gun would not get me to roll back on my throttle. At this stage the only thing on my mind was my blue cooler box! Nothing or nobody was going to slow me down!
30 minutes later, steel cup in hand, ALL WAS WELL!
Not the rain or gale force winds could get me down!
This was a perfect day! A lekker ride! And I was surrounded by GREAT People.
Thank you to all the good souls who helped pick myself and my bike up sooooo many times.
NB! Stairway to heaven … Should read …Lucifer’s lumber punch.
I can’t wait to ride it again.
Do any local guys fit Warn winches to bikes???
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